? Thankfulness ?

Has anyone ever looked around and seen all the things you have to be so thankful for? Survived a heart attack, Jason's up coming marriage, Shelley's job and her making it on her own, still have a job, able to make our bills on time, and got a wife that loves my sorry ass, but with all this you still have one of those empty holes inside that you cant find the answer to. Ever feel like that and thus it robs you of all the other things that should be shining bright in your life? I have felt that way since I moved back to Mooresville area and cant seem to shake it. I said in time it will go away but it doesnt. Been 3 years now and with ever day it just digs deeper and deeper. I know you have heard me say this a 1000 times, but when I lived at Pawleys I was at peace with myself inside. Im told if you seek the answer form God it will be revealed to you, but it isnt. I hear if you seek Gods will then you will have a peace, but what is that will He has for my life? When Im smelling that salt air I am a peace about me that I cant explain. I dont feel lonely down there even if Im just walking on the beach with Killer. I hate to complain and bitch because there is alot of people out there who would love to have what I have and the security of a income, but that darn feeling will just not go away.